Adventure's out there! ...or right here

Figuring out what to do after college graduation has been the most up and down process of my life. I have found myself attaching to various options with complete enthusiasm and sincerity, only to discover a month later that I want to do something else. I have had this constant desire to do something unexpected, something adventurous. You know how people tell you that this is the best time in your life to go somewhere crazy or do something random, because soon you are tied down by responsibilities and there are no opportunities to do stuff like that? I think that scared me into feeling like I needed to go somewhere, anywhere, and take that chance. As if staying in Arkansas would be settling.

And, maybe they are right in that responsibilities will soon come my way and I won't be able to just pick up my life and move wherever I want. But I am realizing that it doesn't mean that I am not living an adventure. Life itself is an adventure, wherever I am at and whatever I am doing. I am returning more and more to the idea of staying in Fayetteville and doing college ministry with Campus Crusade at UA. The way I spend my time would be similar to now, just without school and more training/discipleship/responsibilities with Crusade -- and living on support. I would get to live in the same house I live in now, and I would have the opportunity to continue to pour into girls that I have built relationships with over the past three years. From the outside, it might seem like this would be the furthest thing from doing something random and out-of-the-ordinary.

But I came back to Fayetteville this fall, expecting things to be the same as they were my junior year, and just the past semester I have seen my life go in a completely different direction than I expected. I have a boyfriend whom I wasn't planning on (yet am so blessed by and thankful for), I am leading an additional Bible study that I had decided against, and I have been dealing with more uncertainty than I thought I would concerning post-graduation plans. God is here, in the midst of all of this, and I have been continually reminded to write my life in pencil because He so often erases it. I thought I would struggle with being in a rut, doing the same things I did last year. Despite all of the things that are the same, this past semester has been an adventure, just in ways I didn't expect.

I'm not worried that God is calling me to average. I don't think He's calling any of us to lead an "average life." But a life full of excitement or risks or heart-stopping moments is not limited to specific circumstances or exotic settings. Walking in faith - not always knowing where you are going or what you are doing - is intimidating at times. Living a life of joy and fulfillment is tied to living in the calling God has placed on your life.

For me, personally, I feel that I am living out my purpose when I am talking to people about Jesus. I have invested a lot of my "free time" in college into other people, whether it is meeting one-on-one with girls, leading a Bible study, preparing content for a retreat, etc. and I have experienced so much more joy than I do whenever I am selfish with my time. I don't always know what to expect out of conversations, and I am often challenged to be uncomfortable. As I think ahead to what the next year and a half will hold, part of me cannot wait to see what God is going to do! ...and the other part recognizes that anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach relating to the unknown, the challenges, the support raising. But it's all part of this grand adventure in life, and I am learning to recognize that adventure in my everyday circumstances, not just the big events.